Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Losing It

I happened to be in the same room when a show called "Big Brother" was on tonight. You may have heard of it. I sat down to watch some chick named Chelsia completely lose it, and begin smashing up a bowl of Easter eggs. I wasn't clear if they were her eggs, or the reality-show roommate's eggs. I wasn't actually clear on much of anything except that she was squeezing cracked, boiled eggs through her fingers, while ranting and making crazy-eyes. I found a video of it here, but it's windy, and she's whiny, so I'd skip it, if I were you.

Meanwhile, her little scene reminded me of a coworker losing her cool some years ago. SICK, she was, of other employees leaving their dishes stacked in the company sink, so that she couldn't even wash out her freakin' coffee cup.

Can you say "hormonal"?

"YOU WANT DIRTY DISHES?" she yelled, to no one, as she opened up the company fridge..."YOU GOT 'EM." Out came the mustard. She decorated the dishes with mustard, and then found some bacon bits. She ran the water, floated the bacon bits, and went back to the fridge for more. Every available condiment was emptied on some poor soul's dishes, while I sat watching like a deer in the headlights. "Run," I told myself, "you're officially an accomplice! You know too much!"

I haven't spoken of it until today. It's been my dirty little secret. Whewwwww, so good to get that off my chest, after 9 years...

Have you ever witnessed someone losing it?

Scoop! I want the scoop! Give it, and a weight will be lifted off your chest. That's right, give me the gossip, and you'll feel soooo much better. Give it. Just tell me. Just... tell...ME. JUST TELL THE STUPID STORY ABOUT SOMEONE LOSING IT; JESUS, WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL, JUST SPILL IT! LEAVE A FREAKIN COMMENT! GET OVER YOURSELF! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM ANYWA....


  1. Many moons ago, back when Glock was a compact model still in Jr High he witnessed a meltdown of epic childhood proportions...

    We had two guys at our school that must have been held back so often throughout their child due to prison stints it was the only way to explain how grown men still hadn't graduated to high school yet... facial hair, tattoos, bigger than any teacher at the school.

    I had never witnessed them within 50 yards of each other until one day (possibly when the restraining order expired?) I saw them yelling at each other on my way to my next class.

    And of course, everybody stopped to watch the coming trainwreck.

    Sure enough the screaming devolved to shoving and swearing and yelling and soon the inevitable fight broke out between the titans of our Jr. High.

    Teachers and the principal were already working their way to the epicenter before the blows began, and quickly rushed in as they began to beat each other unmercifully.

    Teacher one... goes flying backwards through the crowd... principal gets thrown... through the air and meets wall... epic battle continues.

    At this point I'd wager that at least a hundred students were packed around (though due to flying staff at a bit safer distance) and watched blood spray... teeth fly...

    It may have only been a few minutes... but it seemed like it took forever for the staff to coordinate a joint assault to peel them apart.

    After a couple more teachers went flying as others (including the principal) held on for dear life, they finally pulled the titans to the ground. By then the other teachers were clearing us out and the sirens of the police could be heard.

    Never got to see the forcible removal... but it stuck with me for the rest of my life.

    Especially the flying principal.

  2. About fifteen years ago, I'd run home for lunch, and as I was leaving the house, a teenage neighbor girl came flying around the corner up my driveway (I lived at the back side of a duplex). She was screaming for help, so I got the door open and we got inside. Her mom, who WAS kind of a friend of mine, was in close pursuit bearing an extension cord as a whip. She began banging my door and screaming. Then she started in on the windows. I thought they were going to break. The girl (14?) was sobbing and kept apologizing to me. I had called 911 and they wanted me to stay on the phone, then I myself began to freak out, and shrieked at the 911 lady, I JUST CAME HOME FOR LUNCH!!!!!! Cops came, arrested her, DCFS took all the kids, I was waay late back to work, and now neighbor lady was after ME. Because, of course, it was all MY fault. Her husband acknowledged that I had absolutely nothing to do with it, but just stay out of her way. She actually believed I caused her to lose her kids (not permanently tho). Geeesh.

  3. StFarmer8:55 AM

    Do ex-spouse meltdowns count?

  4. I was 22 and had a roomate in a 2 bedroom apartment. We both had boyfriends and had them over periodically to stay. Soon though, something happened and hers broke up with her. One night she came through the door after having gone to Del Taco. She saw me on the couch with my boyfriend and without a clue/word/warning, threw her bag of dinner at us.

    The next night I stayed at his house, so I could let her cool out.

    When I returned the day after that, her things were gone as well as half of the contents of the apartment. All of my personal things were there, but community stuff like the iron, pots and pans? ALL GONE.

    She had up and moved out in the middle of the month, leaving me with no way to cover her part of the rent for that month, and the chore of finding a new roomate quick.

    It all worked out, and years later she actually contacted me and apologized. She said she just lost it and took it out on me.

  5. Uh, I've had a few of my own...

    This one time, my family and I were headed to watch the fireworks in downtown St. Louis. I had, like every other time in my life, worn poorly chosen shoes. (When will I learn???)

    My mom decided to park in IL and we would have to WALK ACROSS THE RIVER on a bridge...again, with my sandals on my mind - I was distraught! And quickly fumed and spouted obscenities and squeezed my water bottle until I thought it, and my blood vessels, might explode.

    Thankfully, my family (including my husband who was, thankfully, already married to me) just laughed at me! I'm sooo cute! ;0)

  6. Glock: I imagine flying adults of any sort would make an impression on a kid. Wonder if those 2 thugs ever grew up...

    Bettycat: Whew, that is exciting..and the neighbor lives next to you still? That's uncomfy. I once had to tell the lady next door that she could no longer babysit Brian, as she sucked at it. She still glares at me when I see her around.

    Stfarmer: It all counts! dish!

    Zooom: How dare you have a boyfriend after hers left! Funny she called years later, to make it right.

    Momo: Everyone knows that your tantrums are nothing but adorable. Here, I'll pat you on your little head.

  7. Towards the end of my marrage, I watched my wife meltdown one evening. Our son had wrecked, not totaled, her car. She was upset. I took her to dinner, a nice one, and tried to get her to look on the brighter side. He was okay, the car was repairable and thought that everything was "cool" by the time we got home. I was wrong.

    If it could be opened and then slammed shut, she did it. Multiple times. Her voice rising to the level of a screeching banshee as she progressed.

    My K-9, a 150# German Shepard, decided that hiding in his doghouse was prudent, and he feared nothing.

    Our son cowered in his room. Praying for a quick and clean death.

    I knew my weapons were locked away, so I just sat on the sofa and watched. Making sure that nothing of value was smashed or sharp objects produced. I had to let it run its course. Rented her a car the next day.

    Strange that the same day you posted this that LAPD Wife touched on a similar vein in her post of the same day.

  8. OH, just thought of another one...but this one was all me. And no, I don't live near that lady anymore.

    My aging '96 Taurus was parked downtown on that little short street between the Esquire and Neil Street. We'd had a couple and were heading home and the car didn't start. BF looked under the hood and says "This might be your problem". He pulled out the freakin' new serpentine belt that had gone on expensively the summer before. It had snapped. As did I. After I got done calling the tow truck and kicking the car several times, hard, and called it a lot of very impolite names, we headed toward home. And like Momo, I uttered, no wait, I HOLLERED every expletive I've ever heard and a few I made up. I imagine there was an audience, at least in the downtown area, but I was blinded by rage. BF remained calm and out of the way.

  9. Donno whether you have seen these.If not, here are real incidents of people LOSING IT BIG TIME, in office:

  10. Years ago, I managed for The Buckle clothing store. One night while I was there late fixing a screwed up deposit I heard this HUGE "F U" and about 5 more minutes of ranting.

    I pulled down my gate and looked next door into Claires Boutique. The manager saw me and said, "Hey, wait and I'll walk out with you." We were always encouraged to go out in pairs late at night. I wait and she comes out, leaves all the lights & music on and calmly pulls down and locks her gate. . . an throws the keys back into the store!!! I am standing there will my mouth hanging open and she says. "I quit, want to go for a beer?

    I never saw her again after that night, but I always admired her!

  11. Mine's a roommate story, as well. To this day, I call this woman "psycho roommate" because I refuse to risk calling her up by using her name, kinda like some people do with Satan. Yeah. Like that.

    The SGM and I had been dating long enough for us to realize it was serious and P.R. was starting to show signs of jealousy that I had someone important in my life. So, I decided to move onto dorm for my last couple quarters of college. The night I told her I was moving when the lease was up (and I was planning on staying through the lease!), she started screaming at me about how this was all about HIM and how he didn't love me the way she loved me, how he hadn't been willing to be there for me when my grandfather died (um... the SGM and I didn't even KNOW each other when my grandfather died) the way she had been, and that he was only using me because he was afraid of being alone. Then, all the stuff we had ever bought for our apartments together (this was our third year of being roomies) went over the third floor balcony, including a plant she ripped from the roots and a side table. She also threatened, alternately, to throw me over the edge with all of it or to throw herself over the edge after all of it.

    The next day, she asked me why I thought the plant (she had replanted) looked so bad and wilty.

  12. I lived in Phoenix during my first marriage a lifetime ago and my ex worked at a car dealership in the service department. There was this guy named Davey that was geek-like - wore long sleeve shirts all the time (hello? Phoenix?), slumped when he walked and had a real weasley voice. He was a walking target for all the mechanics to pick on. He ran the parts counter.

    One particular day one of the mechanics was teasing him about something - pick your topic - and Davey was getting upset. He was pale and a red head so you know what his face looked like when he was upset - beet red.

    He got so upset he picked up the computer terminal as though he was going to throw it at the mechanic. Note: this was 1988 or so - computer terminals were huge. He didn't throw it (probably because it weighed more than him.

    Finally as the mechanic was leaving the parts department - Davey through a set of brakeshoes at the mechanic. He didn't know they were coming but had been fortunate enough to open the exterior door at the perfect time and they flew past him and smashed into the plexiglass cubicle my ex worked in.

    The noise was defeaning.

    From that point on, they all sang "Davey's got a gun" to the Aerosmith song - Jane's Got A Gun whenever they walked past the counter.

    Sorry for such a longer story.

  13. BettyCat: Chances are I heard that rant....when am I not downtown?! You're awesome, I'd have given you a Standing O if I'd been there.

    Wil: Geez; it just occurred to me that my son could comment here and rat ME out...

    Aishu: Thanks for the vids; I'll check them out! (Where's your blog?)

    Jodie: Great story; sounds like a scene from a sitcom. I admire her too.

    MK99: I can just imagine the sound of brakeshoes on acrylic walls. And I can't get that song out of my head now, thank you very much...

  14. Uhm, in my life, that person was usually me. Not anymore, thank goodness. What happens is we get a crazy burst of adrenalin and go into fight or flight mode. It's not good. I take medicine for that now. I'm cool. It's all cool.

  15. StFarmer7:44 AM

    On my wedding day we had reserved a room at a nice hotel and specifically requested a poolside room. When we arrived at the hotel ex-wife was EXTREMELY agitated that the room was nowhere near the pool and the room was a double. She stomped around the room tearing up everything she could manage to rip in half and then announced that we were not staying in that room.

    The damage made it a little difficult to obtain a refund from the hotel but we didn't stay there that night. Not the best beginning for a honeymoon and may have foreshadowed the end of the marriage 13 years later.

  16. I have witnessed more female than my fair share of meltdowns. I've carried more than one woman out of my house to avoid any firther damage to person and property.
    I have a knack for making them crazy it seems. Such is the life of a rogue I suppose. One of the best was trying to keep one from burning my clothes in the fireplace. I wasn't so worried about the clothes but I thought she was going to burn the house down LOL

  17. I watched a guy who lost it at the Michigan DMV- he was not called as he had missed his number, and went behind the counter to demand to see the manager.. What he got to see was 3 County Cop cars roll up, with guns out... East coast accent, he got very sorry in a big hurry...

  18. I melted down years I am trying to pull myself together (insert terminator liquid metal scene here)

    I have seen many - most wouldn't be fair to share

  19. Yeah Chelesia really lost it that episode!!! It was funny! Apart from I didn't like it when she went off on Natalie, but Natalie handled it so well and just asked god to watch her.


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