That said, I walked by a bottle of Clamato last night in the grocery store. Clamato sounded good to me. It sounded delicious. I had to have it. I craved it. I'd never tasted the stuff before in my life.
Clamato is, if you didn't know, a juice that combines both clams and atos. For the record, I did find it delicious, though not very clammy. In fact, I could taste absolutely no clam flavor.
On a whim, I checked the ingredients.
1. Water. 2. Condensed tomato juice. 3. High fructose corn syrup
!!! Sugar is the #3 ingredient in Clamato?! In fact, "clam" isn't mentioned until the end, and it's listed as "dried clam broth." Mmmm, clam powder.
I'm sure you're riveted, so I have to share with you that www.clamato.com is one jazzy website. Those Clamato people are obviously hellbent on giving their drink a fun party image: there is a link called "celebrate." There are photos of beautiful people having fun, and it says "Celebrate... at your holiday parties/ with your friends/on vacation..." Hm. I have a big fat idea of just how many guest will show up to my next Clamato party.
There is also a recipe link. A drink called a "Tijuana Taxi" calls for Clamato, beer, and vodka.
I don't juana.
Another for a "Clamato Spritzer" consists of Clamato and Squirt. Squirt?!! Isn't that grapefruit flavored soda?! Grapefruit, clams and tomatoes?! Let's just tip over a dumpster and drink the dregs.
Look what else I found:
Clamato Potato Chips. Ok, they're corn chips, I just wanted to say "clamato potato." Clamato potato, clamato potato. Anybody ever seen these? I juana try them.
The Clamato website states
The brand is well poised for future growth behind aggressive advertising and promotion investment
I'm happy to help their cause by making fun of their beverage for no apparent reason. I actually love the stuff; it's tasty, filling, and a relatively low-cal snack.
And no frog eyes, it's got that going for it.
This concludes my clam rambling. Clambling Rambling.
I think I need some sleep.