Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Yertle the....

Guess the heck what?

My cousin invited me to a Turtle Fry this Saturday!!!

I am SO excited. What the HECK is a turtle fry? I sent back an immediate response asking just that: "Are you really going to fry turtles?" I haven't heard back yet. Stay tuned. I considered waiting to blog this blog until I found out for sure, but I'm overcome with excitement.

Me imagination runs amok. Maybe they don't really fry turtles, anymore than they really "roast"ed Pam Anderson on comedy central last week. They didn't ROAST--that is, bake her with carrot and potatoes, they just told awful jokes about the size of her poonani (www.princesspoonani.blogspot.com) while Courtney Love acted like an assbag idiot in the background.


Maybe they're really going to fry turtles, as "Turtle Fry" suggest.

Do they take them right of their little turtle shells? What the hell must THAT look like, a turtle, Unshelled? I'm picturing a gizzard. With legs. A gizzard with legs. Gizzards aren't so bad. There are family fights over gizzards at every holiday in our household.

Are the Turtle-Gizzards breaded? Grilled, brushed with BBQ sauce? Sauteed with a little garlic & onion?

Be still your hearts! I am going to show up with my camera and a fork, and I will let you know what happens. This is going to be so much better than mooning nuns.


  1. I fear they will be frying turtles. I hope it's not a lobster thing, where they're still alive as they go in the fire...

  2. Lordy. Something I had not considered. You know, I hear that screaming sound really is just air being released from their shells...

    Ok...you didn't throw away the brown paper bag I used to breath in when I cut my finger, did you?

  3. Would it be shelled ..


  4. If it was an actual turtle fry - I would probably be crying for days...

  5. I just picture undressed little turtles in their long johns from a cartoon. Will it be those little tiny ones that we had in aquariums? You could fry those whole like calamari/tarantulas and just spit out the shells. Lil' turtle tapas!

  6. Oh, and I think it pukes me.


  7. lwcw782:33 PM

    It is real turtles! Snapper type that are huge and my husband goes into creeks with a prod and pokes around until he finds one and then he reaches in and grabs it by the tail.(Hopefully) When he gets them home you hit them over the head with a hammer(I go in the house so I don't have to watch!)you cut meat off just like a chicken and deep fry it with fry crisp mixture and beer. I don't eat turtle but I know a lot of people that do. I will have a hamburger or hot dog,thank you!

  8. There you have it folks, straight from the cousin's mouth! Now I'm conjuring up little a Turtle Slaughterhouses, a conveyor belt, and a hammer that dings them on their little turtle heads.

    Clunk! Let's eat!

  9. I always like to hit my dinner over the head with a hammer. Ugh! I can't barely hit a nail with a hammer, let alone a turtle!

  10. Aw, c'mon, PP. I've seen you hammer hell out of a plateful of Baltimore crabs! Hit 'em again!!!

  11. It was me that was hammered! "When was the last time you had crabs?" Funny every time!

  12. i like the cut of your jib.

  13. They're eaten raw, "on the half shell," with a little lemon and Tobasco.


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