Wednesday, February 01, 2006

White Lies Wine

Being a connisseur of fine cheap wines, THIS caught my eye at the grocery store the other day.

White Lies, by Beringer in Napa Valley.

"Made For Women By Women!" the sign reads.

A Woman's Wine, as opposed to a Men's Wine! What could that possibly mean?! Is it injected with chocolate and Midol? Does the bottle come with a candle? roses? batteries?

I took the photo, left the wine, and came home and looked it up.

Oh. Eh. It's WineLite. 25% fewer calories. Less alcohol. Fine.

I should have left well enough alone, but nooooo...I had to go and read this interview with Beringer's Director of Innovation, Tracey Mason, and the Director of Wine-Making, Jane Robichaud, on Here are a few excerpts:

We recognize that women don't always need that regular 14.5% alchohol content wine. With that level of alcohol, we often won't have that second glass, or we'll stop ourselves at none at all.
BWA-haha! "One glass!" "We'll stop at none!" Oh, stop; ya killin' me! That's rich. Well, Ok, I'll concede, someone might worry.

They do want to make sure that you know it's NOT DietRite Wine.:

Diets are associated with tasting bad. [Their focus groups] also said "Don't make me feel bad or like I'm giving something up."

Hm. Now I'm not sure if I'm amused or insulted. The interview goes on:

Q: What makes White Lie different from all the other wines out
there aimed at women?

Any wine with a pretty flower on the label might appeal to women...


...There are lots of feminine-looking labels out there but without our humor and edginess. We went a step further to think about what's actually in the bottle, and not just on the outside of the bottle.

"I Can't Believe It's Not Wine" Wine?

Q: Why the tongue-in-cheek name White Lie?

It's something that we as women all do....

We as women have cornered the market on the white lie? Goo-goo! Giggle.

...We're having fun by winking at ourselves. We all tell little lies like "My hair
is naturally this color," and "I always get up early to exercise."

And "I don't drink."

All Rise!

Jury's Returned. The verdict is:


C'mon; if they had said they were developing a low-cal, low-alcohol wine for smart, dynamic women on the go, women concerned with their caloric and alcoholic intake, I could have rolled with it. Here's what I'm hearing from their statements, though:

It's a faux wine for a woman that lies about the amount of exercise she gets in each day, and is too insecure to admit she covers her gray. She's in denial and extremely sensitive: she can not bay-ah to hear the word "diet" because it makes her feel bad. She's a bimbo that bases her wine choices on the pretty-pretty flower on the label...unless she's feeling a teensy bit naughty, then she'll choose "White Lies." That's just so cute.

What those slick marketing people know but aren't telling you is: She's going to drink 2 bottles of the stuff in one sitting, to make up for the lack of alcohol.

Shhh... Don't tell her we know though; it will make her feel bad.


  1. Hahahaha:) I won't buy white lies...many reasons...main one being there's less alcohol in them. *bleah* Fewer calories you say? I can do half an hour more of yoga for that 25% more alcohol in normal wines. My favourite is German white wine. ( Used to room with a German girl in college and she was great at picking wines for us) Question: Where's Napa valley? Notice I'm too laz to google things.

  2. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Men are not the cause of female stereotypes. We are our own worst enemies when it comes to this.

    These women are jumping on this trend of women "empowerment" and some such nonsense, along with Luna bars and even a brand of cereal from Kellogg's. But what they don't realize is that they accomplish just the opposite, and make us look stupid.

  3. I like your idea for a woman's wine injected with chocolate and Midol! Ha!! I'd drink it!

    I find this stupid-fat ass-lying-women wine insulting too. I admit I've purchased wine before because the label struck me - I'm no wine connoisseur. And I'm gullible enough to buy NEW! IMPROVED! products and sometimes "healthy" things - but I don't like to be patronized.

  4. Go Edina! Yah, I've had a few German white wines; the sweet ones. Pretty good. Napa Valley in California.

    Tracy: Do NOT let Stuart drink White Lies wine. It's for women.

    Momo: I'll fix you a nice glass of chocolate midol wine with Lori-rice stirred in.

  5. This is ( hic) making me feel plain guilty quite honestly! You've no idea how much I get through while I'm sitting working at the computer :-)

  6. FJL: Ya know what's good for guilt?! Another glass of wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine!!!

    [And remember: Never drink and blog!]

  7. Great...less alcohol, now I have to drink twice as much, which means even more calories. White Lie is right.

    Kidding aside, I am really offended. I feel bad for Beringer because they just lost my business.

  8. Good heavens! I'm relieved to hear that women don't really think like that! It's bad enough you get 'diet everything' food without starting on the holy sanctum of alcohol!

    As my sister said this week (nursing a hangover), 'It was only five pints of San Miguel. I can normally put those away without any trouble."

    Pour yourself another glass of Shiraz and open the chocolates!

  9. Wow. I'm impressed, insulted and embarrassed all at the same time. Impressed because they realized there are actually women out there who will buy this line of crap; insulted because who the hell needs this line of crap; and embarrassed because, obviously, some women will buy this line of crap because they need this line of crap. You know, this is the hat trick of marketing...

  10. I joined a running class so that I could continue in my drinking habits and avoid dieting.

    Where is the man from, and worse, what type of women are they basing this on?

    Your outrage was satisfying ... thank you :)

  11. Yarrr!

    I'm a woman who wants all the alcohol and twice the caffeine! I want to drink it in a hot-tub so I feel REALLY sloshed! I won't do a sit-up to save my life and I'm PROUD of it!

    Where's the slick marketing for ME, huh? I'm a demographic, dammit!


    Also, I prefer red wine.


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