Friday, February 16, 2007

Veird.

Both Sveny and Bob have tagged me for the "6 weird things about Me" meme. I actually did this back in October or sometime, but since my Veirdness isn't limited to 6, I'll play again. I shudder to think how many times I could play along without running out of ideas.

1. I constantly calculate the overall cost of a gallon of anything. .25 ounces of Chanel No. 5 costs $95.00. 1 ounce of the stuff, therefore, costs $380.00. There are 128 ounces in a gallon. The cost of 1 gallon of Chanel No. 5 comes to $48,640.00. Before tax.

$50,000 a gallon.
I refuse on principle.

2. I'm crazy-ticklish.


I make myself quite vulnerable, telling you this. My son and his friends are infinitely amused at my response to someone walking up behind me and poking me in the ribs. An instinctual, gutteral, altogether UN-Princess-Di sound, like "HUhnggggg!" comes screaming out of me, and I jump 3 feet into the air.

I've been known to accelerate wildly if you grab my knee while I'm driving. Just don't do it; you might lose your life.

3. I'm allergic to my cubicle.


I'm not sure if it's psychosomatic or mere dust on the carpeted cubicle walls, but 8 a.m. Monday mornings bring me to such sneezing and nose-blowing fits that I'm sure my coworkers want to kill me. Gone are those cute little sneezes I used to emit. It's more like BLAHhhhhhhhhhhh-BLOOOOO!; scaring holy hell out of all my poor coworkers. I'm sorry. It's incontrollable.

4. I'm terrified of heights, but I love rollercoasters.


Stand me on a kitchen chair to change a lightbulb and I want to vomit. Looking over the edge of anything, my knees, calves, and pee-hole tingle. Yes, my pee-hole. I can't even view heights on a television show without feeling nauseous.

Still, get me on a rollercoaster, and I'm in heaven. The initial climb makes me a nervous wreck, but the dooooooownnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn is a thriller. Upside down, rightside up, freefalling, front row...I'm there, screaming and laughing and loving it. Whoo Hooo! Let's get back in line!

5. Since my son left for the army, I have a recurring dream: People walk into my house.


They're everywhere, and I cannot get them to leave. If I get them out the front door, I turn around to find more have come in the back door, or are just standing in the bedrooms. I resort to violence in every dream, to get them out of my house.

I have two interpretations for this dream: 1) I fear someone walking in the door, and having no protection; and 2) I am protecting my solitary existence.

6. I make Gourmet Ramen Noodles.


I can make 19-cent ramen noodles worth your while: I add peas, shrimp, and thai chili paste, and then scatter green onions and pepper over the top. I don't imagine there's that many varieties in the Asian grocery store just so you can add water, jack.

7. Can I have 7+ weird things? I might have more. I e-mail myself all the time. Memos, blognotes, reminders: "Get bday card," "make a will," "don't forget the ramen noodles in the 'weird' blog."

8. I try to write all of my dreams in a Dream Journal. It took me 10 years to fill the first one, and it's full of strait-jacket material, such as "I'm crawling down the yellow line in the middle of Bradley Avenue..." and "I've sprayed salt water all over the slugs in my living room, and now they crunch under my feet when I try to walk."




Sweet Dreams, ya'll. I tag you, even if you've done it before.

Six.

Hmph. I know you have more.

11 comments:

  1. I can't think of any. Have you read my blog lately. I'm stumped, perhaps I'm not recognizing my own weirdness?

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  2. I shudder to think how many times I could play along without running out of ideas.


    that just about sums it up for me too! :)

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  3. Hey U WEIRDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO :-)

    ahhh that is some great stuff, I am removing the Gallon of Chanel No.5 from my list of things to send you... but I will send over someone to sneak up and tickle you --haha

    Ramen noodles---hmmm One night after a college party I came back to the dorm and all I had after a long night of beers was ramen noodles peanut butter and a coke :-(
    so I spread the peanut butter on some dry asssssss noodles and washed it down with a coke.... yup I know, U want one now!!

    Good LIST thanks for getting WEIRD with US weirdOOOs

    Bob
    PS I am a Post-IT not Freak...I have notes all over my house to remind me of things I need to do. I only wish I bought stock in 3m back when those suckers came out.

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  4. What about the time we almost got killed in your car when the butterfly hit the windshield...and you were under the seat whilst trying to drive....okay. that may not be weird so much...

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  5. The dream one:

    Also could be that so many strangers have invaded your life that you seem to be losing everything that is dear to you.

    A variation that a lot of single "empty-nesters" have.

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  6. I'd like to know who's been grabbing your knee while you drive!

    "Scared of heights". Who don't you overcome your fear and give this a go.

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  7. i think i refuse to think about how much something costs in non-miniscule quantities -- because it becomes obscene! $50k for chanel -- you may ruined me for perfume!

    am ticklish and scared-of-heights-but-love-rollercoasters too! yay!

    my sister taught me a ramen noodle thing: boil the noodles but don't put the seasoning in. drain the noodles and pat with butter. sprinkle with some of the seasoning (DO NOT use all of the packet) and toss. quick, easy, and sorta pasta-like.

    and your slug pic and corresponding salt-infused, crunchy dream turned my stomach!

    i, for one, enjoy your weirdness! :-)

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  8. I am terrified of and detest roller coasters, yet have no fear of heights.

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  9. Mim: Bloglines hasn't been highlighting you! i've been waiting and waiting...I've checked in now. We'll find 5 more weird things about you, I swear it!

    BP: Finding 6 "normal" things about me should be the challenge.

    Bob: I won't pay $50,000 for a gallon of Chanel, but I'll be happy to accept it as a gift.

    Peanut Butter and Dry Ramen: I used to munch on spaghetti right out of the box, when I was a kid, but never a ramen cake.

    I love Post-Its too.

    FrugalM: That butterfly was HUGE, don't you remember how it cracked the windshield?

    It could have.

    Wil: An interesting twist, esp. with my single status. Strangers HAVE invaded my life...or tried to!
    Thank you Paradise Freud! You're a genius!

    Dogbait: Hm. Now that I think of it, it's been awhile since anyone grabbed my knee. Everyone knows better I guess. As for the skydiving, I've actually considered it. I haven't ruled it out, at any rate. Wonder if they'll let me do a shot, first, for courage? Don't drink and dive!

    Nancy: It's settled then. I'll got to Six Flags, you go to the Sears Tower.

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  10. Anonymous10:58 PM

    #1. Laughing hysterically when someone stubs their toe.

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  11. Oh please I do gourmet with ramon as well and everyone thinks I'm nuts!!

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