Thursday, December 21, 2006

Six Degrees of Eavesdropping

Example of eavesdropping portrayed by my friend Lori, and stranger Bob
from Baltimore. No permission from absolutely anyone to use this.

After slacking all month, I've been in holiday-readying frenzy for the last week, with little time to blog or read blogs (comparatively, that is). So, just to put something out there, I bring you an amusing anecdote from the past.

I was once standing in the foyer of a busy restaurant, telling my date about a play that I'd just seen "Six Degrees of Separation" at The Station Theater. There was full frontal male nudity in the play, and if that's not great date conversation, I don't know what is.

So, there I was, mentioning how surprising (yet fun—don't get me wrong!) to be sitting in the front row of a confined theater with a completely naked stranger 3 feet away from you.

We moved on with the conversation, wondering to ourselves if we could possibly get a menu to peruse while we waited.

Just then a woman standing in front of us turned, and said "I'll give you my menu if you tell me the name of that play you just saw."


What's the best thing you've ever overheard?

Have you ever interrupted other's conversation upon eavesdropping?


  1. Here's my Station Theater/full nudity/dinner afterwards story. Four or five years ago, I saw a play (I don't remember the name of it) at the Station that had full female nudity. Afterwards, we walked over to Jolly Roger for a bite to eat, and some of the cast, including that actress came in. Everybody in our party agreed she looked a lot better (sexier) with her clothes on. I guess airbrushing does have its virtues. So what did you think about the guy in the play you saw -- better in tight jeans?

  2. I just love the picture posted with this, but not because it illustrates your topic so well. No, it's that delicious and tasty looking beer in the frosty mugh and the yummy little shrimpies on the plate in front of her that have ME sporting wood! Since I read I no longer remember the funniest thing I personally overheard.

  3. Funniest thing I ever overheard was at work but I can't remember it right now. I'll be right back...

  4. Anonymous8:23 PM

    I totally want to start a "six degrees of overhearing" now. Next time I'm at a movie theater, I'm going to lean over to my compatriate, and in a very loud whisper say "Hey, did you hear the news ... Jessica Simpson is pregnant with Bill Clinton's baby".

    Every once in a while I'll go on Wikipedia and insert something like this on a celebrity's page (I know, I'm so BAD!). Sometimes celebrity sites even pick it up as news ... hehe.

  5. Anonymous1:24 AM

    I wasn't eavesdropping, I was working diligently at my workstation when I heard an attorney talking to his secretary, I clearly heard him say "the last time I was in a woman..." I got up from my desk and walked to where he was and said: "Stu, you can't talk to your secretary like that!" He just kept talking, "the last time I was in a woman was in 1986, the Statute of Liberty...." I crawled back to my desk.

  6. I saw "Six Degrees of Separation" at the Krannert, and was shocked, I tell ya, shocked when the boy stomped out on-stage naked. Good play.

    I was driving along one night with my windows down, sitting at a red light, and this convertible pulled up next to me on my right. The car was an expensive model; the couple were young, well-dressed, perfectly groomed, and beautiful. And fighting. Fighting loudly. The shrew said something like, "I don't care. Go to hell. Just don't care. You bore me." The asshole, seemed more visibly upset. He was leaning toward her, pointing:

    Asshole: This is it. It's over. You treat me like shit. I'm done.

    Shrew: Yawn. Take me home.

    Asshole: I don't know what you want. I do everything for you, and you treat me like shit. Fuck you!

    Shrew: Maybe if you didn't fuck everything you look at, I'd give a shit what you think.

    Asshole: Oh goddammit! Here we go! You're full of shit. Don't even start with that.

    Shrew: It's true.

    Asshole: If you want me gone, you got it. I'm not putting up with your crap anymore. I don't need this.

    Shrew: ::suddenly looks at me::

    Asshole: ::turns around and looks at me::

    Me: Leaning sideways, eyes wide, mouth open, listening to every awesome word.

    They look ahead. So do I. Will this light never change?

  7. Amishlaw: Hmmmmm. Well, no complaints, but if I'd seen him in the jolly roger, I'd go with the jeans.

    AndyT: Thanks for the link. Very amusing.

    Laurie: Ok.I'll wait.

    Anita: You're messing with my wiki!!

    AZ: Too funny....but you had great intentions.

    Tracy: Hilarious! I've turned down the radio before to listen to others, but its usually to hear them sing.

  8. I always miss what's going on. I always have to tear myself from my own thoughts and say, "What? What happen?" :)

  9. I missed the second half of the question. It's a terribly rude and bad habit of mine, but I butt into other people's conversations I overhear all the time. Awful manners I know but I can't help myself!

  10. Stephen: And is your wife smacking you in the arm, "you missed it!"?

    Andy: I do it too, if the conversation is obviously loud enough or in my vicinity-enough to warrant my saying "I couldn't help but overhear...."

  11. Once went to a play in which every cast member was naked, including the lead, who also happened to be my roommate. It's was a musical about a murder on a nude beach, based on a true story -- certainly one of the oddest theatrical endeavours I've ever seen.

    The funniest thing I ever overheard: a man sitting behind me in Starbucks, complaining to a friend that his thirty-year old son was still a virgin, god damn it, and why wouldn't someone want to sleep with the boy? What's wrong with him? He's a good son! Don't you think he'd probably be a good lover, too?

    It took a huuuuuuuge effort not to laugh out loud.

  12. I played Mabel in The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told and we had full frontal male nudity ... and my family came to see it! The funniest thing I overheard there was when my naked castmate asked if anyone had a penis warmer. Guess the cold was shrinking things up a bit much for him. LOL!


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