Monday, October 16, 2006

News You Can Use

Or not.

For the most boring blog entry ever, I present to you:

New dental floss infused with toothpaste. I love this stuff, it's all soft and yarn-y. They stopped making yarn-y dental floss a couple of years ago, and I was all sad. I had to go back to using the waxed stuff, which they claim "glides" but it really "slices." "Slice" is a sucky name for dental floss, though.


My friend Diane and I are in different magazines this month. That's right: We're famous.

Diane was interviewed by my anOTHER friend, Jennie, who then wrote about her in an article for Ancestry magazine. They are both quite prestigious now.

I am merely in a write-in blurb in Cookie Magazine; they asked "how do you get your child to talk more?" And I wrote "WHEN my child was x-age," we did THIS...only they edited to read "my son rides his bike along next to me when we walk..." Boy, anyone that reads that and knows us is going to think he is one Mama's Boy Soldier.

I will neither confirm or deny that.


I got an e-mail on my personal account today, from my boss. It read "hot tea is ready."

Catch-22! Do I pretend I didn't get his e-mail because I'm working so hard? Or do I go get a cup of that kick-ass tea he makes with his home-grown mint?

Eh, he obviously knows I'm online. That tea is some good stuff. Puts me right to sleep.


At Tai's recommendation, I picked up Lemony Snicket's Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning. I'm not thrilled to love it, as there are 12 more in the series, and this is going to cost me, big time.

I'm also reading Kane and Abel, by Jeffery Archer, and mucking through The Portable Dorothy Parker, which I love, but like to read in bits.


At my mother's requests, I am going to try to sell my father's archery equipment. I've brought home both hunting bows and competition bows. I know nothing about either, and guess I'll get about researching the issue. If any of you have any advice, feel free to e-mail me.


This is some old news, but while I was in LA, I succumbed to an eyebrow waxing. If I do say so myself, I'm blessed with good eyebrows. I never touch them; I don't pluck, wax, or string.

Still, the little pedicure girl that made my big toe bleed kept telling me that I needed some tidying up, indicating that I had a looming uni-brow. I figured it would only cost $10 to find out what LA eyebrows look like, and hell, they'll grow back if I hate it.

They make you lie down for this procedure; had you any idea? I came running out of the surgery room, raising my eyebrows at Lori for her inspection, and she responded "they look exactly the same."

Yeah, except since that very day, I've had a purple blemish tucked right into the arch of my right eyebrow—dont look at it! I'm just saying: I think I came home with heinous LA scar tissue. For only $10.

Thank God I passed on the Brazilian, eh?


Though I've been spotted making horrendous faces over the taste of a martini, those crazy Maryland girls introduced me to my new favorite drink: a Dirty Martini. It is a martini with a shot of olive juice in it. Dirty Martini, where have you been all my life?

Just what I needed at 43.75 years of age: hard liquor and more salt.

Still. It's fun to order a drink with the word "dirty" in it. "Naughty" would be a good runner-up.


Dirty martini is what I'll order at Boltini's on Saturday night, around 7:30, at The C-U Blogger's Meet-Up.

I've been asked to stop telling God and the whole world about myself, but there I go, posting dates, times, and places, where I'll be, on Saturday night. All you stalkers beware: At least 20 bloggers got my back Saturday night.






  1. I got your back, and I love the dirty martini. I'll probably be drinking the dirty bloody martini (with a shot of bloody mary mix thrown in as well).

  2. I love this post, it's so random and yet it made me laugh several times. :)

  3. Anonymous8:43 AM

    Kaylin has that series of Lemony Snicket books if you are interested in borrowing....Im sure she'd let you.

  4. YES! Finally someone to commiserate with about the lack of yarny floss! I miss that stuff like the dickens. Thanks for the heads up on the new kind.

    Wish I could be at the meet-up. Have a good time!

  5. LOL. I'm with ya on the floss. I'm proud to be associated with your dirty martini phase - salt and hard liquor are a wonderful combo if you ask me. Waxing. It's all just so funny. Wish I could be at Boltini's on Saturday night, around 7:30, at The C-U Blogger's Meet-Up. Have an extra olive for me!

  6. Slices! Ha! So true! That stuff is waaaaay to thick!

    I wanna see these magazine articles... Waaaaa!

    That eyebrow waxing is tough. Painful! Makes me break out!

    But you have always had nice brows. I am the one with the Bert uni-brow. In fact I should go change my profile pic to Bert with a wig on or something. Can you photoshop that for me?

    I'll have your back at Boltini's too. Not to mention the 200 lb. guy I'll be bringing with me. (Who's gotcherback too!)

  7. You got my back....I'll tell my Puerto Rican homies to get on the first flight ASAP and we'll make sure to bust/blow/pop some caps in places obscure to mankind...

    What I'm reading: "From Hip Hop to Heaven" a very interesting account of a Rapper's ex Personal Assistant and how she learned to balance both her loves: music and God..

    yeah..I'm readin' a book on God...
    ::rolls eyes::

  8. People tell me I post too much about myself also. However, the way I see it, I'm out there in the world every day with all sorts of crazies. If someone's going to get me, it probably won't be someone who reads my blog. It'll probably be some guy who follows me home from Kroger.

  9. Great site and I love this blog, viewed from London, Best regards, Robert

  10. Mal: Dirt & blood in your martini? Hmmm. Ok, I'll try it.

    Trouble: Discombobulated thoughts, lately.

    Not-so-anon: I'll keep that in mind!

    jag: Still have to meet up in Nashville!

    Wendy: Come to the CU bloggers meet! yay!

    Momo: Park in our secret place, so we can walk in numbers!

    MaryP: It's good to have friends in high places...puerto rico AND heaven!

    Laurie: I'm witcha there!! I figure the first thing I do upon meeting anyone is give them my name, rank, and serial number. The kroger line cracked me up though.

    SS: Thanks, I've bookmarked yours now too!

  11. Good point about floss. And slice? You bet it can slice in to my gums if I am not careful. Yay for softer floss!

    I loved how you meander all over the place with your post.Very well done.

  12. A. Yarny floss squeaks on my teeth. The sound hurts my teeth. Ick....

    B. You should try a Rainetini, invented by a friend, Raine. Vanilla vodka, shot of selzer, and *3* maraschino cherries. Yum....

    C. I'm gonna make the meet-up, but I can't get there until almost 9:15---I have the little man 'til about 9pm. I'll be the sober one joining the group checking for wooden legs.

  13. Sanjay: Thanks for stopping in. And encouraging meandering thoughts; I've got a million of 'em!

    Gamera: YEAH! Yarny floss nice and squeaky. Like paper towels on a shiny window. clean, clean. That sound doesn't hurt my teeth, but biting into baklava does.

    B. Can I put olive in my rainetini?

    c. Bring the 'lil man...Ahem. Can he reach the gas pedal yet?

  14. I do love a dirty Martini, but I haven't had one in quite some time. Whew! I got some stories about vodkaaaaa!!! :) I'll never tell.

  15. Hey girl...glad you liked my book suggestion. It's flattering and fulfilling to think that people really DO read what I write!

    (Oh, and btw, if you happen to see my blog somewhere, can you let me know? It seems to have gone astray.
    I'm really cross as I'd been at that one for almost 2 years. If/When I start a new one I'll let you know!)

  16. Sadly, I understand the horrors of eyebrow plucking, first hand. Have you ever had them 'threaded'? It's a middle eastern technique which people claim hurts less than waxing or plucking, but they're all liars. >:P

    oh, wait. let me bold that....


  17. Arg. Dirty martinis. Arg.
    Love catching up on you though!

    word ver: fnsmzxrs

    Fun mixers?

  18. I got an e-mail on my personal account today, from my boss. It read "hot tea is ready."

    *laughs* Maybe it was an accidental email. ;)


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