Tuesday, December 20, 2005

APB: Is This Yours?

A friend called me recently, asking to borrow my staple gun. "I don't have a staple gun," I told him. "Yes, you do, we stretched your canvases with it last spring."


Oh. Yes. We sure did. But oh, yes, I borrowed that staple gun from my boss, and I don't have it. I don't think. Let me check... Ohmigod, there it is, still in my toolbox! I borrowed that thing last April! I have to get this back!... Well, after I loan it out again, I will promptly return it!

So, I brought the thing back to my boss yesterday, saying "I am mortified that I have held on to your staple gun for 8 months. I am so sorry." And he said: "That's not my staple gun; mine is green." I'm pretty sure it's his though, so he takes me to the garage and proves it to me: Ta-DUH, THERE is his green staple gun, I can see it with my very eyes.

Now what? Is this MY staple gun? Did I go buy one when I needed it last spring? Was it just there in the toolbox that I got custody of after the divorce? Or did I borrow the damned thing from someone?!! The accompanying staples don't even look familiar, they have an old-timey sticker price tag on them!

Is this YOURS? If it is yours, give me a call, and I'll get it back to you, and, really, I apologize in advance for keeping it so long.


  1. It's not mine. Mine is yellow.

  2. For Heaven's Sake...That's where my staple gun is! ;-) LOL

    Just kidding....I, too, have a staple gun and mine came with the divorce. I have used it once or twice. That thing can be lethal! Luckily, when I first was figuring out how to use this 'alien thing' it was not pointed toward me 'cause a staple shot out with great force! I haven't picked it up since!

  3. It's not mine. I used mine just two days ago to hang some Xmas lights (yeah, I know you're not supposed to do that). Oh wait, that's DAVE's staple gun.

  4. Freakin' hysterical. It's MINE dammit! Clearly you somehow beamed it out to you from my toolbox and I wants her back! She'sa gotta sentimental-a value!

  5. LOL! Andy, is it really yours?

  6. Anonymous2:22 PM

    You can't have a staple gun.. you'll shoot your eye out. RS


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